Thursday, April 30, 2009

Inaugural Blog...or Bog...or...something clever, anyway...

So, I have a blog. (insert party horn noises, imagine confetti being thrown) Woo!

Ok, now what?

I have people who pretend to listen to me in real life - they're called my children. In cyperspace or Internet-topia or wherever this is, no one "pretends" to read blogs that they don't like to be polite. They just don't read them. Why should mine be different? I'm not famous in any way - let's make it simple and post a list of reasons why this blog probably won't be read. It'll be fun.

#1 - I'm not a professional athlete. This blog will not be used to make excuses for poor play, off-the-field problems that affect play or to bitch about the poor play of teammates as the reason why my team sucks. Same for complaining about referees. Though I might occasionally complain about my Detroit Lions, because even though I love them, they really do suck.

I can absolutely guarantee there will be gloating about the upcoming fantasy football season, where I will be defending my championship as the only girl player in the league, against mostly my husband and his friends. Suck it, boys!

#2 - I'm not a singer/actor/person who is not talented who is famous for no reason. No "accidental" postings of my cell phone contact list, which is not cool at all, unless you want my kids' pediatricians' number. No random blogs with me foisting my politics onto you or enticing you to donate to my charity. Though I might be able to get some friends to post nude pictures - I just can't guarantee that they will be of them.

#3 - I'm not a politician or someone who works for FoxNews, CNN, MSNBC or any other "trusted news source." No politics here. Or as they should be called "Overpaid Professional 3-year-olds." Wait, that's insulting 3-year-olds...they aren't able to reason yet.

Hmm...so why should you read? Well, you don't have to. But here's what you'll find if you do - I'm a regular person with a regular life and regular problems who is occasionally funny (or so I'm told). Occasional lowbrow humor, stories about my family and crazy people I encounter.

In other words, a blog like any other - self-centered. :)

Kat